A New Vantage Point
July 16th, 2009
As I awake from my slumber I find myself at a new awareness about money. It would have been the job of my father to teach me about many things. Trusting myself and listening to my voice within and valuing that voice would have been helpful. So, as I now awaken to my own awareness of the value of this I am also keenly aware of many times in my life when I knew better, but didn’t have the courage, or knowing or whatever to stand up for what I thought. This is nowhere more keenly felt that in the area of money. I have listened to others so I could be loved and accepted and perceived as loving, etc. all my life. Now I can easily see where I knew what would have been the best and I let somebody else decide for us and I followed like I had no head.
As you can probably tell from the tone of this post I am angry with myself about this. My sun is in Taurus and my rising sign is Capricorn. These are both signs that are good with money. I always knew how to handle money, I knew, I remember knowing, but I didn’t have the self assertion needed to speak up and be heard. It is so silly too, I let somebody, a lot of somebodies make the decisions about the money.
Well, not any more. Don’t misunderstand, I don’t really care about having a lot of things. But I do see now that life doesn’t have to be lived on the edge. There is an easy spot. I can see now that it isn’t that hard to find. I can also see that enough money has always easily flowed into my life. I just didn’t speak up about what we did with it.
I am not mad at those who took responsibility for our money. I am not even mad at my Dad who stripped me of my courage and my own right to make my life the way I want it. Well maybe I am a little mad at my Dad. But I am really mad at me. I am not afraid of anger. I know that it always is part of my growth and part of my new understanding. I see anger as the feeling of my own energy coming forth.
It is a new day for me and my family. Now I will teach my children what I didn’t teach them before, even if it is just by example at first. And I will gently and easily guide our money to a place of peace. I love this waking up stuff. I never know where it will lead me next, but it is always practical and helpful to my life right now.
I appreciate all of you who tune in here for my latest updates along my path.
Filed under: Anger, Decisions, In Our World, The Path of Love, Waking Up | 3 Comments »
Unconditional Love
July 9th, 2009
I’ve made a decision. I want all of my relationships to be based on unconditional love. There are a lot of people out there who understand and respond to love, in fact most of us do. Isn’t it so wonderful to relate to someone on this basis. To find the lovely aspects and to focus on these. There is so much to each one of us. We all have so much to contribute. So much love to give. It’s true, you can take the most grouchy person and begin to love them and see only the beauty in them and either they will turn and show you that side or they will move far away from you.
I saw a video on uTube a few days ago, of Amma, she was just hugging people. I don’t want to hug people all the time, but such love! We all have this within us. Some of us, at certain times, may not be able to get to it, but it is still there.
So, to all who visit this blog, whether you comment or not, it is my great desire that you feel welcome, loved and valued here. And that you know that I know how beautiful you are.
xoxo Anne
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Getting Clearer
June 24th, 2009
Yesterday I wrote about a new value of myself. Today I am having another new awareness. I want to write a book. I know I’ve already written a book. But now I want a book I write to be read and talked about by influential people so that many will read it. What has changed? I know why I want to write it. Before when I would think about writing and being published and well known I would have this voice saying some variation of , “you want to be famous so others will think you are valuable and you know you must think yourself valuable first.” This may seem like a harmless thought, even a true one, but it stopped me in my tracks.
As I turn the corner on a new value for myself I can see that there is much more here than I previously understood. I love, love, love to interact with others on my blog and on theirs. I love writing and others commenting and me commenting back. I love reading what others write and leaving a comment and then them commenting on what I say. I love this interaction. I really do. All the way through me.
So now I can understand a clear motive for writing a book, because I love to write and I want to interact with others. I want them to send me emails and tell me what they are thinking and I want to respond. I want to meet with my readers and commune around the ideas. It’s not about receiving value it’s about reveling in and enjoying the love.
How good it feels to allow my desire to fully come forth without any judgment, and with a pure understanding of what I want. And now……I can allow this fully allowed desire to come forth. I don’t know any details yet, and I don’t even care. I know that loving and allowing and valuing and cherishing my desire will bring it to being. I know this. I’ve experienced it too many times.
I only had this realization just a little while ago and I went into Ken’s office to tell him. (Ken is my husband and he works from home.) While I was telling him, he looked over at his computer and the clock said 11:11. I always love this number, it means alignment to me, (I got the idea from Esther Hicks). But then his eyes got big and he looked closer and right above that number was 111111, the total number of emails in his inbox. I do feel so in alignment with this awareness. I so appreciate the universe conspiring to bring my attention to this, it makes me feel so loved.
My new value is about how much I love writing and about how much I love interacting with all of you. And that I can and will take it further. Wow. Pretty good I think. xoxo Anne
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Better Feeling Thought, Decisions, The Path of Love, Waking Up, what do I want | 6 Comments »
Glass Half Full
June 9th, 2009
Have you ever noticed how much we talk about problems, or about what we don’t want or about helping others (which implies they need help), or how to get more money (which implies we don’t have enough), or this or that or whatever?!
Two days ago something happened to me, I don’t know what to call it, but I know what’s different. Suddenly and without warning, I am noticing what a good day people are having. Everybody I meet has plenty to be thankful for in my eye. The server, has a job. The lady at the bank knows well what she is doing and has a comfortable job. The man at the restaurant is enjoying his food. My children are having the life of their choosing and are right on track. All that I want comes easily to me. I just know this now. No more struggle, no more judgment. Just lovely people having their day. And all really is well. There is so much to enjoy and be thankful for, so much. I can see this now. And suddenly the cup is half full. And the issues people are working with aren’t problems but opportunities to move toward that which they want. It is a kind of opening. Without fear, opening.
This has come right on the heels of another beautiful awareness I have been having. And that is one of surrendering and trusting everything, one by one, to my Greater All Knowing Self. Me, trusting me. Really trusting, no more control. No more figuring anything out. But just waiting for answers to come. And clarity to come. And it comes, easily and freely.
The surrendering has come just after ending my own personal work. Well, I guess we never really end our process of maturity, but a long chapter has closed, after almost two years of intense personal searching and questioning. I talk a lot about this in my blog posts. In fact, that is the reason I am writing this here. This blog and my book document the path I’ve taken toward awakening. Not that it has any great importance, only that I want to keep the remembrance.
Life is new, it’s not what I thought it would be. It is fresh and free and really peaceful.
I know a post like this may or may not feel so good to you. And that’s ok. But, if it’s what you want, I can show you how to get here. Either by reading and applying the ideas in my free book and blog posts or by contacting me. I won’t waste your time. I’ll work with you freely in love and freshness. Or not. I am allowing my teaching to unfold in the timing and ways of my greater nonphysical Self. And I know what I need to know, as I need to know it. And I……. am really enjoying the peace and love and joy.
I can’t imagine what might come along to knock me away from my connection. But if it does, I am trusting myself to stay aware and come back to myself.
Thanks to everybody who follows along here with me. I love and appreciate you.
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Better Feeling Thought, Decisions, How do I proceed, Letting Go, Waking Up, What is Enlightenment, alchemy | 11 Comments »
Trusting and Allowing Myself
June 4th, 2009
I am coming to know that when I simply allow myself to be, whatever I am at the moment, I free myself to become who I really want to be. And after all this time of wanting and working to be me so much and wanting to grow so much I realize that I can have all that I want without giving up anything I really want, and that I can have it all.
I’ve never given up anything, I’ve really only gained. Because letting go of something was always about letting go of my perception about something and finding another, much more helpful way to see it.
When I allow me, just as I am, whether it be to sit for two or four hours to watch TV or whether it be to eat a bag of candy, I am knowing that when I do that, allow myself what I really want this moment, I am loving myself, I am not fighting with myself, I am not criticizing my self , I am not trying to make myself do something. I am just gently lovingly and allowing myself to be, this is where my freedom starts. And soon, after I let go of all judgment of myself I feel loved and cared for and I don’t want that candy, I just don’t want it right now, and I want to clean house instead of just sitting there watching TV.
And so much more importantly I stop the fight. I just stop. And I let love come back into my life. I open up to trust myself and when I do that I open up to trust Myself. Things start to move and loosen up and I get ideas about things I want, new ways of seeing come to me, Things start to drift by me that I want. I feel loved and honored and respected and cherished and then, I know that I was here all along. Me- one with all that is.
And then something really fantastic happens, I can love others in the way I’ve always wanted to, and I can feel that love flowing through me. And it is such a joyous feeling, to know that I’ve come home to myself. And that I accept and allow myself to be and the life I have been dreaming of actually begins to come to pass right before my eyes.
I am love and I open to it. That little girl that I knew so long ago who just loved openly, has come back to me. And now I know how to love her and embrace her and allow her to be.
And if I hit a snag and all I want to do is eat candy, I’m going to let myself, because I know if allowed to be I will snap right back to remembering my own energy and my own being. I trust myself and I am one.
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Decisions, How do I proceed, Letting Go, The Path of Love, Waking Up, alchemy | No Comments »
Allowing That Which You Really Are
May 21st, 2009
“You are killing more of each other every day over your quarrels over religion than all other things put together, because you cannot even come to an agreement about what you think God says, or wants for you. On one side of the world God wants something different than the other. On one side of the room, in one side of your mind, God wants something different than on the other. The power is within you. You are extensions of this powerful Source Energy. You are literally God expressing in this physical body. And so, as you are standing in a thought, or in a word, or in an action that feels good to you as you are standing there–then you are fully open and allowing all of that Divine Energy to flow through you. And in that moment you are all that you said you would be when you decided to come forth into this body. You are the extension of pure positive energy. You are in your full creative power. You are thriving. You are clear-minded. You are joyful. You are filled with love. You are who you are–you are allowing that which you really are.”
— Abraham
I love Abraham. These words of wisdom seem to cut through any confusion or concepts or misunderstandings. They remind me that I want to offer my words here on my blog, knowing that I am speaking to myself first and foremost. After that, if you or another reader finds clairity or love in them then that is my desire. This is a personal journey we are on and nobody knows what is between you and your voice better than you. I appreciate so much this entire collaboration, Abraham speaking, you and me listening and valuing. Thanks for stopping by and for reading.
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Better Feeling Thought, Decisions, How do I proceed, I am a human being, Letting Go, The Path of Love, Waking Up, alchemy | 2 Comments »
Listening for Our True Voice
May 15th, 2009
Before you read the words here, I want to acknowledge their clumsiness, I speak them from love and with trust.
It seems that fear captures any ideas it can to keep us under control. Using teachings from any spiritual tradition or way to disallow union.
Instead of listening to themselves and understanding I notice many choose to meditate away or stop thinking.
There is a place to give up thinking and for meditation but not to shut down the voice of the inner child that hasn’t ever been heard. I feel it’s imperative to listen to and hear that child and value what is heard and offer comfort and come to understanding. And then to redecide.
The more we listen and value the more we free the voice of ourselves. And the more that voice comes forward and the more we become ourselves.
Spiritual development doesn’t mean getting better and better at quelling the inner voice and emotion so that we don’t feel the stress of our separation. It means listening and allowing ourselves and redeciding and trusting so that we don’t need systems and ways to handle the stress.
The old stresses disappear and new open free life comes forward. And we are no longer usings skills to cope.
Our true self is free to move forward with life enjoying new views and realizing every desire, and openly trusting life.
I don’t speak from anything I read or was taught, I speak from my own experience of finding and listening to my own child’s voice and learning to value that precious voice. And becoming trustworthy (learning not to judge or turn on myself) and being there for myself.
Then, and only then, that person, the real me, little by little has surfaced.
She’s found freedom It’s my job now to stay awake and continure to listen and allow and value.
I offer these words as gently as I know with great love.
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Dispensing Wisdom
May 11th, 2009
I think I’ve been an unconscious wisdom dispenser for a long time. How do I know? Because I get so upset when I see others doing it. You know what I mean, somebody telling you what you don’t want to hear, haven’t asked to know and usually already know for yourself better than the teller.
I have decided to allow others to figure out their own stuff. After all, each one of us is Source Energy, and each one knows best for themselves.
I’ll answer if someone asks, gently with an eye to my own humility.
Tending to my business on my side of the street. My business, I am becoming aware, is a very lovely and awesome subject.
How do I really know what another needs to hear, and how do I know when the timing is right? I can’t.
My own life is the only communication that can really be heard.
When I do express, as here on my blog, or in my books, I want to own what I say as my own experience or my own understanding. Expressing first for myself, then trusting that my life can be of benefit to the greater me. And if not, that is fine too. Never with the attitude that I know more, or that somebody is messed up or wrong or needy in any way.
And with this ownership, I can finally let go of my grudge against those who I see dispensing wisdom and step out of the picture completely. And I can enjoy peace and freedom in this area.
Thanks for reading.
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Better Feeling Thought, Decisions, How do I proceed, I am a human being, Letting Go, The Path of Love | 13 Comments »
Freedom
March 19th, 2009
No matter how you experience this idea of freedom I think it boils down to one thing……I get to do, have, be what I want. I get to make my own choices.
You could divide the stream of life into two parts:
Part 1 Becoming aware of my desire. This is about allowing and feeling:
- Noticing that I want something
- Allowing it to get bigger, if it does
- Feeling to see if I really want it
- Deciding, yes, I really do want that
- Finding the essence of what I want
Part 2 Supporting my desires. This is about appreciating and thinking.
- Finding a way for my desire to be OK with me
- Finding a way to look at what I want that makes it valuable
- Encouraging myself to follow my bliss (another word for what I want)
- Dealing with my thoughts that don’t believe I can, will, should, am worthy of, whatever it is I want.
- Trusting that we can all have what we want here, no matter what it looks like to the contrary.
Moving forward with life means awareness of what I want and the courage to mentally take myself toward it. When you are this lined up with who you are things happen, life starts, new ideas come, people come, opportunity comes.
You are free to persue your life, your way!
Filed under: Anne's Favorites, Better Feeling Thought, Decisions, How do I proceed, Waking Up, What is Enlightenment | 4 Comments »
The Value of Projections
March 13th, 2009
Everybody in your life is a projection of you in some way. I know you’ve heard that—but do you know how to use this information in a practical way?
When I have any uncomfortable thoughts about another person I find a quiet place and I sit down and write. I make a list of everything that bugs me about them. Then I put my name in for theirs and I have a wealth of information about how I really see myself.
Now I can look at each thing on the list and see if I can see that in myself. If there are any I can’t see – I look closer and get more exact on what bugs me in this area. And I continue to look until I find how I am like this other person in every area that really bugs me.
Some things I am aware of and some things not. After I see myself from this new vantage point, I can redecide what I believe and how I want to act. Also, I am much more allowing of the other person I was projecting on because I know how it is to not be able to see myself.
Here is an example: Ken and I spent the weekend with another couple, by the time I got home I wanted to rip something up! I sat down and made my list, I was having trouble finding my issues so I looked deeper. I realized that what really bugged me was how they continually talked between themselves in my presence on subjects they wanted to teach me about even though they knew I didn’t really agree. OOOO, I found it! Then I put in my name and I almost immediately could see how I did the same thing to other people in my own way. I also realized that by doing this I was presuming that I know more about other people than they know about themselves. And I don’t believe that is true. I decided right then and there that I would never do this again. And, when I am with that couple now, I am not even aware if they are doing this or not, because there is no hidden projection.
What this whole process does is make me more aware of what I believe and what I do and who I am, and who I want to be. I am more open, more loving, more honest and more free without my blind spots.
It works, try it for a while with each person who really bugs you. It could take a few times to get to the bottom of some things, but man is it worth it to be free.
We project what we are unaware of in ourselves. It is a fact. We can use this knowledge to grow beyond our wildest dreams.
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